Rueful Quadrant
by Aka-Chibi
Summary: The cat may be a skilled huntress, but even it can be out matched. Gamzee and Nepeta, kismessisitude
1. Chapter 1

He stared her down, like a devilish predator about to snap the neck of his prey and devour it mercilessly. It's an ironic twist, considering how she was the one who hunted the most and had the greatest experience.

She glared at him with strong hatred, yet it was easy to see the fear in her grey eyes. He looked back at her with a humored grin as if this was all a game; that killing her precious moirail is no different then striking down a imp from his planet.

That killing her will be no different either.

His cracked lips opened, some indigo blood that dried open his skin flaked off, and he softly uttered out a word. "Here kitty kitty kitty…" Suddenly, he shouted as he was determined to let the whole heavens hear his voice. "GET OVER HERE BEFORE I MOTHERFUCKING KILL YOU."

She hissed, trying to sound intimating as possible. "No! Stay away from me!" She shrieked as she tried to crawl away awkwardly, trying not to use her broken wrist.

He laughed with delight as he strolled up to her, making her tremble enough to fall. She whimpered as tears gathered up in her eyes, and attempted to shield her face with an arm.

It did little help.

He struck her stomach with a club, forceful enough to knock her some feet away. She yelled with pain, some olive colored blood shot from her mouth. He roared with laughter as he paced over to her and struck her once more, trying to hit her further away like a golf ball.

After that he just went with beating her with both clubs.

Repeatedly, he walloped and whacked at her body. Her screams brought more and more pleasure in him, and so he hits with increasing strength.

Then she stops screaming no matter how many times he struck her.

He frowned as stopped attacking her, now observing the motionless body that laid on the ground before him. She was on her side in fetal position, the bloody arm that was protecting her head drooped away from her bruised face, exposing her closed eyes. Her precious blood was making a puddle around her body, big and thick enough that he could see his reflection in it.

He saw a sickly troll, a messy hair that was more messy than usual. His carefully applied face makeup was smeared and ruined, with four deep cuts on his face. Seeping from these cuts was his indigo blood, where most of it dried up on his skin and was flaking from his movement.

He looked at once more before using his club to push her body onto her back. He examined her body as if he had never seen her in his life before.

She was a short troll, looking ever so small compared to the large trench coat she was always wearing. Her bruised face was round and chubby, adding onto her young appearance. Her hair was as messy as his own, but just more neater -perhaps the work of her picky moirail. It was mostly hidden by her blue fuzzy hat, with buttons to add on a catty look.

He frowned, feeling a bit strange. Was it guilt? That he had killed the troll seemed to be the most youngest of them all? Or was it pity?

He shook his head and reached out to brush her shirt up to her stomach, wanting to see what she was hiding under the stained black fabric. She had a nicely formed abdominals, though maybe not as well as her moirail. Feeling around her arms, he found that she some noticeable muscles even if he found some broken bones and swelling of the skin. No doubt that hunting for her food paid off.

Smiling, he seemed to have forgotten the strange feeling he had earlier. Instead, he was now humored. How strange it was that she, a skilled huntress, could not even scratch some skin off of him. It was as if he had to hurt himself _for_ her… which he ended up doing anyway.

With a laugh he kicked her body that caused her to roll onto her stomach, faced down to the ground. He yanked the hat off of her head and wore it himself, since it was a pretty sweet hat anyway.

On his way out of the area, he pick up her fallen moirail's cracked shades and wore it too.


	2. Chapter 2

It was cold at first.

It was like she could feel all of the warmth quickly draining from her body. Nepeta had the urge to shiver and to hug herself tightly, but she just couldn't. She was much too numb… It was if the only thing she could do is just drift about in this empty space.

Sure, it was lonely at first, but she eventually gotten used to it. The coldness didn't seem to bother her anymore; it was actually starting to turn more warmer and comfortable. This was disturbing.

Smiling, Nepeta Leijon looked around in this dark void as she waited. She knew her time had come, and soon she will inside her dream bubble.

She sighed with content. "I can't wait…" She started at first before she paused.

Something didn't seem right in her mind.

It was a sign of displeasure.

_It's too soon._

She blinked, unsure of what to make of this… this… feeling?

_You can't die now. Your time hasn't come yet._

This peaceful void that surround her suddenly felt more hostile. She curled her lips over her fangs, baring her teeth as she growled with newfound rage. Her toes dug hard into the ground, her fingers wrapped into fists, as if this will stop her from harming whatever has upset her.

_He killed your best friend; the one person that understood you. The one who wants to protect you no matter what the danger._

With growing rage, she could feel some grief creep up inside her. Olive colored tears seeped into her eyes, threatening to spill with

_He needs to be punished. _

The small sorrowful feeling quickly vanished, being replaced with another emotion to mix in with her outrage; lust for revenge.

She wanted to kill that fucker who crossed her; the one who made her feel so pathetic and weak. How dare he ruin her! To take away her moirail; her soulmate! To take away every chance she had of to accomplish her desires to complete her own personal shipping!

She trusted him, she enjoyed his company even. He was so innocent, and she always thought of him easy to just… break. She could just easily reach out when he was passed out on his horn pile, and rip his throat open with her claws as if he was a creature she had hunted. However, because it wasn't in her nature to do such a thing to her friends, she didn't.

What did he do in return? Wallop her in the head with a club.

Nepeta craved badly to just stalk him, watching his every move hungrily as he wondered around about; not knowing what might be lurking in his shadows. She wanted to reach out and stroke him, touch him, _feel_ him when he wasn't looking, spooking him badly as he turned around and find nothing there.

She wanted to crouch in his very sight, looking for the fear to touched his disgusting messy face and his red eyes. To know that he will be thinking to himself, "Oh fuck" as he turned around to try and run. She wanted to then pounce on his body, knocking him to the ground as she leans her head towards his delicious smelling throat and tear it to pieces.

To taste Gamzee Makara's salty indigo blood on her tongue and hear him scream and cry.

Nepeta smiled evilly to herself, her eyes shining every so brightly in this void.

As if Fate had decided to give her a second chance, she suddenly felt pain again.

"Oh no…" She cried to herself as she held her head. Pain was not a thing to look to.

"Oh no, oh no, oh no, oh no…"

She shut her eyes tight, nails digging into her scalp as terrified tears rolled down her cheeks.

"Oh no, please, I don't want to feel more pain…"

Suddenly… She was gasping for air as she clawed at the wet floor. Nepeta sobbed to herself as she pressed her bruised forehead to the ground, shaken silly as she felt all of the pain in her body and how terrifyingly cold she felt.

When she looked up, her eyes fell on the body of her moirail: Equius Zahhak. Shivering, she slowly crawled up to the body.

His face was a huge smile with missing tooth. His eyes were opened and wall eyed. His throat was wrapped tightly with a broken arrow string, tight enough to cut into his skin and leak blue blood. Tight enough to suffocate him…

Breaking out another sob, Nepeta touched his face. Her eye brows arched and created creases in her forehead.

"I'll kill him for you, you silly meowrail…" She said softly in a hoarse , dry voice. "Even if you don't want me to, I'll still do it for you… You're so stubborn with killing the highbloods anyway…"

She smiled.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: I do apologize for the lack of updates, my laptop charger broke. But I got a new one and hopefully we'll return to daily updates.

His hand was grasped around a hammer. It's so fucking colorful, like a rainbows of colors to represent every flavor of Faygo he could imagine. It's a work of beauty, and he was fortunate to find it in a chest he stumbled upon.

No sooner did he held this precious, powerful weapon he stowed it away in his JOKERKIND strife specibus. Gamzee knew it's a special weapon, and he knew he should save it for something special. Already had he develop a plan in his mind, and he was smiling rather wickedly at the thought of it.

Sure, he was sore all over… Specifically in the place where Kanaya Maryam had kicked him and sent him flying over a cliff. How he managed to have survive the fall with only an aching back will be a mystery to him.

Cracking his knuckles with anticipation, he set off to seek for the others.

Along the way, he found the bodies of his fallen friend: Tavros Nitram. Gamzee stared at the body of his best friend. The one who understood him…

When he first discovered the body of Tavros -broken, cold, and oh my god WHY IS HE BLEEDING SO MUCH- of course Gamzee would be thrown into a huge fit of anger, then remorse.

This innocent troll, this troll who's been through so much. If being thrown off a cliff, crippled, and then eventually have his leg sawed off right in front of Gamzee's very eyes didn't seem to wipe off that beautiful smile off his face for long, then what will? Gamzee admired Tavros, the troll who's spirit didn't seem to break or even crack.

Even when he found the dead body, Tavros's face wasn't pulled into frown or a pained look. Really, it was more of a surprised look, as if Tavros wasn't expecting his death to come so quickly.

Gamzee already knew who killed Tavros. It was Vriska Serket, of course. He just knew that it was her.

That troll, the one who had Tavros wrapped around her finger.

That troll, who caused the death and grievance of many trolls with her devious mind. He knew she could even do it by accident.

And it was a moments like this where he wanted to snap her head off of her shoulders. Maybe it was the fact that he always seemed to hide from her for a couple of sweeps and he was finally fed up. Maybe it was the fact that she killed this beautiful soul, who's lifeless body was in his arms and pressed to his chest as he chocked back tears.

Or maybe it was the fact that he was downright crazy now, bloodthirsty even. He had his taste of killing trolls a little more than an hour ago, and frankly something sparked inside him.

Was it hidden feelings he forced back with soper pies? Or was it natural instincts, sick in every ways?

Gamzee wasn't sure what the answer was, but looking down at Tavros's dead body he couldn't help but feel some sort of pleasure. To see his blood dripping out of the hole in his chest - the hole Gamzee made when he pulled the lance out of the troll's body before captchaloguing it - and drenching his black shirt, it made Gamzee happy for some reason. He even felt disappointed that _he_ wasn't the one who killed his troll, even if it was Tavros.

Oh wouldn't it be so wonderful, to just sit here and marvel at this work of art.

But he knew he couldn't. Gamzee knew he needed food and nutrition to keep himself alive. He needed to move, to keep himself strong. To keep him alive enough to find more of this art. Still, he knew that he couldn't simply drag a dead body with him.

A humored smile that pulled at his lips, making some dry indigo blood flake off of his skin, Gamzee tilted Tavros's head back to expose his neck.

And he tore at it with his sharp teeth, cutting through flesh, muscles, and veins until he fully decapitated the dead troll.

He held the precious treasure between his hands, staring at Tavros's eyes. Gamzee had the sense to kiss it, to try and bring life into Tavros, but he knew it was a ridiculous idea.

How can you bring back the life of a troll you just beheaded?


	4. Chapter 4

They were all on the roof top… at least the ones who were still alive, that is.

4. Just 4 trolls, were alive as far as Karkat Vantas know. The fact that they were standing right in front of him, moving and breathing, was the only proof that they were alive. Anybody who wasn't on this roof will be considered dead.

Karkat was sure that Equius Zahhak was dead. The troll never responded to his messages anymore - but then again, Karkat discovered that Kanaya Maryam had Equius's crack shades all the long. Either way, Karkat was certain that he had just caused Equius's death.

When he asked Kanaya about the shades, she responded that she had just kicked Gamzee off of a cliff and snagged the shades he was carrying. This added on to Karkat's suspicion that Equius was dead, and that Gamzee was either dead too or just badly injured.

Tavros was dead - Terezi Pyrope told him. Vriska was dead - her body was _right there_ in front of him! Karkat had witnessed Feferi Peixes's death, and Kanaya told him that she killed Eridan Ampora. Aradia Megido had exploded a long time ago and was presumed dead.

As for Nepeta? Karkat's not sure, but he had a hunch that she was dead too.

So all that left so far was Karkat, Terezi, Kanaya, and Sollux Captor. Except now Sollux was blind, and Kanaya is a glowing rainbow drinking.

Just fucking great.

Karkat sighed, as he sat on the ground and pinched the bridge of his nose. How could so much deaths happen in one day? How could things go so wrong in a matter of hours? Karkat obviously pinned this on himself.

Maybe if he had watched Gamzee carefully. Maybe if he had stepped in when Sollux and Eridan were fighting. Maybe if he didn't tell Equius to do his job…

Karkat heard some foot steps and felt some hands on his shoulders. He didn't need to look to know who it was.

"Are you moping again?" Terezi asked.

"What the fuck do you think?" Karkat grumbled.

She sat down next to him and took his hand. "Moping isn't going to help with anything," She said.

"I know, I know. You don't have to remind me."

"Why not? It seems like you keep forgetting," She chuckled.

"Well, what do you expect?" He hissed with frustration as he squeezed his eyes shut. "Today is a fucking nightmare, and it won't ever end. There's only the 4 of us so far, and the matriorb is destroyed."

He felt her lips lightly touching his cheek, giving him a nice comforting kiss. Karkat also heard some sniffing, which was pretty much expected of Terezi.

"Cheer up, Karkles! We'll think of a way. There's no good in being sad in the dark when we can find the light," Terezi said.

Karkat almost made a smile at her, but he suddenly froze. Terezi was confused at first, and was about to ask what's wrong before he shushed her.

He was certain that he heard something. It might have been paranoia speaking, but he swore-

There it was!

Terezi's eyes widen. She heard it too. Karkat's eyes flickered over to Kanaya and Sollux, and they were standing still too.

They all knew what the sound was. They heard it so often that they were accustomed to it. But now? It was like the loudest sound they have ever heard, and it was terrifying.

It was honking, and it grew louder as the seconds past by.

Karkat and Terezi got up and hurried over to Kanaya and Sollux. It was better to be in a big group. Better protection.

Within moments, Gamzee appeared. He walked slowly, as if he didn't had a fuck to give to the world. His face, so messy and dirty, had 4 ugly cuts on his face and it appeared that just recently did they decided to heal and form some scabs. His eyes were red, as if being insane changed them from normal golden yellow. But above all, the most terrifying thing to behold was what's in his hand.

It was the Warhammer of Zillyhoo, in all of it's rainbowy glory. When it comes to a hammer that's as big as that, Karkat had a disturbing thought that his head will probably be smashed to bits like a hammer on an anvil.

Gamzee ceased walking when he was only a few feet away from the group. Everybody had their weapon ready, but one of them will fight the crazed troll.

And that was Karkat.

He was tired of running. Running and hiding was what caused most of his friends' death, in his honest opinion. There were only 4 of them left, and he wanted to protect what he had left. He wanted to protect his best friend, his motherly friend, and his love interest. With a sickle in hand, he was prepared to launch himself after Gamzee when Sollux suddenly asked, "What's that sound?"

Everybody was quiet. Even Gamzee appeared to be confused, as if this wasn't a part of his plan. A minute went by when Karkat finally asked Sollux, "What the fuck are you talking about?"

Then he heard it. This time everybody heard it.

It was… purring? It didn't quite sound like purring; it sounded more hostile. Maybe it was growling, not purring. It was hard to tell, the sound seemed so far away.

But Gamzee instantly recognized it. Karkat watched Gamzee's face move from surprise to content. Karkat still wasn't sure what it was until the last moment.

"Oh my gog-" He uttered before suddenly a loud roar could be heard. This time, it was very near them as if the voice had quickly moved from far away to here. The roar sounded so terrifying, like it was a very angry lion about to kill you. As far as Karkat knows, it wasn't an understatement.

Nepeta suddenly sprang out of the darkness, throwing herself at Gamzee. He seemed to have seen this coming, and blocked his face with his arm as he fell onto the ground from the force of the impact. If he didn't cover his face with his arm, he would had more cuts on his face. Instead, his arm was being ruthlessly clawed and cut as Nepeta was sitting on him, mad out of her mind. With a free hand, Gamzee smashed Nepeta off of him with the hammer where she rolled onto the ground as a yowling mess. He proceeded to get up and walk over to her, an evil gleam in his eyes.

Everybody else was watching the two fight with shock. Karkat saw that there was now 6 trolls who were alive, not 4 as he had earlier believed. He watched Gamzee grab both of Nepeta hands and pinning it to the ground, watched him press his knee against her side to keep her on the ground, watched him raise his hammer and hearing everybody else yelling while she hisses, did Karkat realize that there will only be 5 trolls alive if he doesn't do something to stop this fight.

Karkat ran as quickly as he could over to Gamzee, tackling the crazed troll before he could deliver the finishing blow to the troll he held down. He had difficulty trying to hold Gamzee down, but with the help of Sollux who joined his side they were able to restraint Gamzee from getting up and moving. Karkat shooshed Gamzee, papped him too, until Gamzee became quiet and calm for once. Karkat pried the hammer from Gamzee's hand and decided to confiscate it until Gamzee was trusted again. Fuck, should he even give back the hammer at all?

Karkat turned his head to see how Nepeta was doing, not really surprised to see Kanaya and Terezi holding her down. He was, however, surprised to see her putting up a nasty fight.

Nepeta was trying to claw her way out of Kanaya and Terezi's grip as she glared at Gamzee with such an intensity that he had to look away. She managed to give the two other trolls some cuts before Karkat went off to confiscate her claws too.

When he pulled one of her claws off, she flinched and hissed at him which was enough to make him freeze. He tried as best as he could to be careful as he pulled the claw off, where he discovered that her wrist was swollen. It was broken. Karkat, now looking at Nepeta as if for the first time in his life, noticed just how bad she looked. Bleeding in some places, broken in others. How could she still put up a fight when she looked like she was about to die?

"Nepeta!" Karkat said to her, trying to catch her attention. She was too busy glowering at Gamzee to notice until Karkat grabbed her chin and tilted her head towards him. "Stop it, Nepeta! You're going to fucking make yourself worse. How would Equius react to see his moirail so hurt?"

Nepeta finally ceased struggling, and she staring at Karkat so hard that he felt his skin crawl. Her eyes weren't red like Gamzee, but they were blood shot and wide which give her a wild look. It was quiet for a moment, until Karkat saw tears filling up her eyes.

She mumbled something, so when Karkat asked her to speak up. Nepeta gritted her teeth before talking in a harsh, quiet voice.

"He's dead."

Despite the fact that she was crying, her face was pulled into face of pure fury. She looked back at Gamzee, and she was breathing hard as if she had forgotten how to breathe in the first place.

"I'll kill you…" She said quietly. Then, with a might roar, she screamed "I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU!"

Karkat, deeply regretting what he had said, asked Kanaya and Terezi to haul Nepeta back into a room where she can rest up. "I don't know how the fuck we're going to calm her down with killing someone, but we have to try or she'll just kill herself," He told them before they walked away.

It was just Karkat, Sollux, and Gamzee now, and everything was silent. Gamzee's arm was bleeding badly, but he didn't care.

When the two trolls wasn't staring at him like a wild animal about to snap, he was smiling pleasantly to himself as he thought about Nepeta.


	5. Chapter 5

For the past few minutes, it was just the same thing over and over again.

Terezi and Kanaya had dragged Nepeta into a room where they could try calming her down without the risk of her escaping.

They spent a few minutes bandaging themselves up- the cuts they received from the frantic troll was not very pretty to look at. The spent the next handful of minutes trying to do the same for Nepeta, but it proven to be near impossible.

As if she was a caged lion with a broken limb, she evaded all of their attempts to hold her down. She was restless and refused to simply sat put, no matter how much scalemates Terezi had brought for her to lay on. There was only one thing inside the troll's mind, and it was to make her escape and then to spill some grape juice. Metaphorically, of course.

But she couldn't easily do that.

They all got here through the transportalizer, and Kanaya had it strictly guarded. Nepeta was acting more foolhardy than usually, but she had enough sense to stay away from the rainbow drinker with her deadly chainsaw equipped. She knew enough about Eridan's death to be wary of Kanaya.

So escaping was going to be difficult. Even then, Nepeta still lingered away from the other two trolls.

"Nepeta, will you stop running away already?" Terezi asked, exasperated. "You're _bleeding_ and I smell olives. Too much olives. That's not a good sign."

"And running won't do you much good either. You need to save your energy, and I don't think frolicking around like a little grub could be considered energy saving," Kanaya added on.

Nepeta said nothing. For the past few minutes, she merely sitting in a corner as far away as possible from the two and they decided to just leave her there. Terezi sat on her scalemate pile, chin on her hands as she watched Nepeta eyeing them suspiciously. Sadness easily seeped into her, making her wonder where has the good old Nepeta went; the one who purred and cuddled under their chins. Terezi certainly missed her.

"Nepeta…" She called out to her again, in a soft tone. The wild troll was still staring at her, although it was more like she was still staring at space. Nepeta was still crying -like a small droplet rolling down her cheeks- but her face was blank and still as she was a statue with no feelings. Whether or not she will actually listen, Terezi continued. "I know that you're feeling some black feelings for Gamzee…"

Suddenly, as if the name snapped her from her mind, Nepeta hissed malevolently as curled her lips over her fangs.

"I … I …" She uttered, as if she had forgotten how to speak and was trying to remember. "I … Want… To Rip… Him…"

Terezi lifted her eye brows at the cat trolls, but continued talking as if Nepeta hadn't spoken at all. "See look, I'm pretty sure me and Sollux have some black feelings for Gamzee too."

Nepeta looked at Terezi, and for the first time in a while surprise filled her face instead of fury and hate. "You… you do?"

Terezi nodded her hate. "I don't know about Sollux, but I just can't stand here acting as if nothing had happen. He committed so many crimes, Nepeta. Theft, imposter, mentally torturing someone, death threats… Death and attempted murder." She whispered the last part and watched Nepeta's chin tremble. "I just want… Punish him, really. I want to deliver justice!"

"Here, I wish to simply auspistice anyone who wants to wring their hands around Gamzee's neck," Kanaya admitted. "From what I had heard from this very moment, there's 3 possibilities so far."

Nepeta looked at the two, not sure what to make of it. She really did thought she was the only one who felt black for Gamzee, and that everybody else wouldn't understand why she felt this way and only wanted to block her from her feverish goals. Maybe they didn't understand, but they were close enough to make her trust them a little bit more. Finally, her face curled up into a distraught expression. All hostile and distrust feelings she had felt now left this room, leaving her with grievance and regret. For the first time within the hour, she was sobbing as thick tears poured out of her eyes. Kanaya and Terezi was finally able to safely come near her, peel off her dirty trench coat and some pieces of clothing, and start wrapping up her wounds. They still need to some how make a cast for her broken bones, but for now they were relieved to help her heal.

Within moments, Nepeta was like a little mummy, being all wrapped up with rolls of bandages. If anything, the only places that wasn't covered was small parts of her body and her face.

Feeling like she hadn't slept in a million sweeps, Nepeta wearily crawled up to the scalemate pile and curled up on them with Tailor Cloudfang in one of her arms. Before she could close her eyes and sleep for who knows how many hours, she felt a sudden lurch. At first she thought that the scalemate pile had disperse underneath her, but she noticed that Kanaya and Terezi seemed to have slide a bit; as if the whole room as lurched.

Or perhaps it was more than the whole room…?

Kanaya and Terezi decided to go on ahead and transportalize out of the room to investigate when they assumed that Nepeta had fallen asleep. She was, in fact, not asleep. Curiosity picked at her mind a bit, pushing some of her fatigue away as she got up from the scalemate pile. Remembering that she was not wearing any clothing - not counting the bandages- she simply pulled on her trench coat and tightened it close.

She slowly followed after the two trolls, wincing and cringing multiple times as if she was now aware of her wounds and injuries, with Tailor Cloudfang still in her arm.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Sorry the long wait. I'll try my best to avoid any mistakes.

Everybody was on the roof top again, but by the time Nepeta has limped over she found that there were some new acquaintances to be seen.

Floating there as if she hadn't a care in the world, was Aradia Megido in her new shining glory. Since the last time Nepeta has seen her, Aradia was just this dead, forgotten troll who stood amongst them. She had a difficult time remembering how the lowest blood face looked without a frown upon her red lips; but looking at her now, Nepeta was taken back with surprise by how happy and beautiful Aradia looked when she smiled. It was as if the troll never died in the first place.

For once in her life, Nepeta could see Aradia in some richly dressed clothes instead of her old torn up casual clothes that were meant for lowbloods. With red transparent wings sprouting out of the troll's back, Nepeta could see that Aradia had ascended to God Tier, and a little part of her felt a little proud of this lowblood.

Near Aradia were these two humans - or, at least, that's what Nepeta had assumed they were. Trolls had their normal, rough grey skin, while these two had skin like the silkiest pale pink velvet. Nepeta almost felt afraid to touch them, as if a single stroke to these strange creatures' skins will make them crumple and break apart. Instead of a normal troll's jet black hair, they had hair of the whitest and brightest pearls.

One was a female, and Nepeta could tell that she was Rose Lalonde. Nepeta could still remember that conversation she had with Rose, asking her if she could speak with her kernelsprite in hopes to fill in that gaping void Nepeta felt when she missed Pounce de Leon badly.

Compared with seeing Rose on screen to seeing her in real life, Nepeta couldn't bring herself to not gawk at the pretty human like Kanaya was obviously doing; but perhaps with less lust in her eyes. Lips covered in black lipstick with a modest smile, eyes as purple as the freshest lavender that sprang from the ground, not a single strand of hair out of place, Nepeta could easily find Rose to be beautiful in a nice, royal way. Dressed in elegantly orange robes, she was like a golden fortune teller considering the fact that she was the Seer of Light.

Eyes moving over to the other human, Nepeta eagerly observed it.

Dave Strider; the "cool cat" she secretly dubbed. Although she hadn't spoken to him as much as she wanted to, that didn't stopped him from impressing her. Or maybe she was just too easily impressed by fascinating new things?

He stood there like a motherfucker that's too chill to be excited by the fact that he's meeting some actual aliens, even if Terezi was practically gushing over the fact of how red he was. As the Knight of Time, there was a sense of nobility that surrounded him, even if the one knightly thing about him was his fashionable cape. It was difficult to see past his cool shades, but if she were to look closely she could possibly see his red eyes within his lazy expressionless face.

The humans appeared to have ascended to God Tier as well as Aradia, considering how they weren't wearing their usual T-shirts or such. The three boast of unimaginable powers, even if they were all watching the remaining trolls with a friendly look.

Well, at least one of them still had on a friendly face. Dave was as skilled as expressing his feelings like a rock, Rose looked a bit crestfallen, and Aradia looked as if she's having the time of her life. It took her a few minutes to realize it, but Nepeta noticed how everybody's eyes were lowered to the ground. Her own eyes following their gazes, she noticed a puddle of blood on the ground.

A yellow, mustard colored blood puddle.

She flinched as she noticed for the first time the body that lay oh-so-close to her feet. It was Sollux, sprawled on the ground as if he was only sleeping. Nepeta knew well enough that he wasn't, and her evidence was the large amount of blood seeping through his face. Blood that dripped out of his nose, his opened and teethless mouth, and his empty eye sockets that were hidden by his borrowed goggles. He looked oddly peaceful, laying there on the ground, as if he died half awake and surprised.

Nepeta slowly backed away from the corpse, frightened to find another dead body in front of her.

_Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no…_

Something flickered by Aradia, and it caught Nepeta's attention as long as everybody's else.

It was Sollux, floating next to Aradia. Nepeta didn't know how long he may have been there, floating, but she certainly knew it was long enough. He looked much neater than his dead body, with no blood on his shirt and no borrowed goggles. However, his eyes were black and white.

So, he was just half-dead? She hoped he was - or was it okay to hope that?

Minutes passed by and the next thing Nepeta knew, she was sitting alone while everybody else grouped together some distance away. She would have joined their conversation, especially when she heard the mention of "corpse party", but she felt much too tired to pay attention. She had a small regret for not going to sleep instead of coming out here; Nepeta could hardly keep herself from nodding off.

But once in a while, when she turned her head towards the group to see what they're doing, she could see Gamzee staring at her. When she saw him staring at her, a chill would run down her back and her stomach would feel tight and sick. Nepeta would then made a face at him to try and intimidated him, but he would smile humorously at her and return his attention to the group's conversation.

Oh how he angered her.

Around 10 minutes had passed and they were still talking. Nepeta didn't know what she was waiting for, but she knew now that it wasn't going to happen. She got up and left the scene, not interested in anything but sleep.

Perhaps if she still had her strength, she would have been stubborn and refused to leave anybody's side if Gamzee was in their presence. She didn't trust him, even if he seemed so calm in everybody else's eyes. But now she was flat out tired and the thought of sleeping on the comfortable scalemate pile was dreadfully inviting. It was that, or the thought of Gamzee going against three and a half trolls and three God Tiers was very trusting.

So she was back in the room where Kanaya and Terezi kept her, and laid down on the pile. She still kept on her trench coat despite how filthy it has become within the last few hours, as its warmth and familiarity made her feel safe. Eyes closed, she quickly drifted off to sleep.

Of course it was all blank and such. With no Derse to visit, dreaming became more plain and less exciting. It was that, or she didn't get the chance to indulge in her dreams.

Not long after she slept, Nepeta was lightly shaken awake as something whispered her name. At first she was frightened, but when she opened her eyes she found Terezi's red eyes staring down at her with concern.

"Thank gog, I was afraid you were goner there…" She breathed with relief as she brushed some hair from Nepeta's forehead. "I was afraid…"

"Why?" Nepeta asked sleepily as she rubbed her eye. "I'm not _that _hurt you know… Sleep can't just kill me like that."

"No, no, Nepeta," Terezi said, smiling a bit. "It's just that…"

Nepeta stared at the other troll. She was curious at first, but as sleep left her body fear crept in.

"Did _he _do something…?"

"Well… yes," Terezi admitted. "You see, while we were talking, we didn't really keep an eye on Gamzee…"

"And?"

"Well, the next thing we knew, he was gone. With Sollux and Vriska."

Nepeta stared at Terezi, unsure of what to say.

"So… he's gone?"

"Yes. Kanaya's trying to find him," Terezi replied. "With her chainsaw. I just came here because I thought he might have… done something while you were sleeping…"

Nepeta's eyes widen.

"You don't mean…?"

"I guess you can say we're allowed to do some clown hunting," Terezi joked a bit. "As long as Karkat doesn't find him first, you know. Moirails before friends, I guess."

"Huh…" Nepeta breathed, not quite sure how to respond to the news. She laid there in the pile, staring into space as she tried to figure out what Terezi just told her.

As Terezi laid down with her, Nepeta couldn't help but wonder what she was dreaming about. Normally, she would have dreamt of silly dreams and adventures. This time, she was sure it was something different.

It may have been paranoia, but she swore she felt something touch her cheeks. It may had been the whimsical voice that whispered "sweet dreams while it lasts…" in her sleep.


	7. Chapter 7

It's been well over a month now, so it wouldn't hurt to relax a bit… right? Well Terezi doesn't quite know how to respond to that. It's been a month since the whole "Gamzee stole some dead bodies and now is missing" incident.

Ever since he went missing, Kanaya immediately went on a "clown hunt" for him. Chainsaw in hand, she didn't seem to care that just hours ago she had a hole blasted through her stomach. Terezi wasn't sure how the rainbow drinker could walk around like that - shouldn't it hurt? - but she decided not to ask Kanaya about out of politeness… even if the smell of grub sauce filled her nose when she stood too close to her.

However, no matter how many hours or days it took, Gamzee was an elusive bastard and managed to keep himself from getting caught. Kanaya would walk off searching, sometimes accompanied by someone, but will always return with a scowl on her elegant face.

Terezi wasn't sure how she felt about it. On one hand, she wanted Gamzee to be alive because they all desperately need as much trolls as possible. On the other hand, she wanted Gamzee gone for all of the god damn trouble he caused. If possible, kill him herself.

But she knew that Karkat was relieved that Gamzee was still alive. To see Kanaya coming back with no purple blood over her clothes or her chainsaws was like a breathe of fresh air to Karkat. Terezi knew that no matter what crimes Gamzee has done, Karkat wouldn't care. Gamzee was his moirail, and moirails watched each others backs.

It made Terezi wondered if Karkat knew where the clown was hidden, or if he had anything to do with Kanaya's failed attempts at hunting. It wouldn't really be surprising at all.

Terezi tilted her head to the side when she heard some foot steps approaching her. She braced herself, not at all worried for what's about to happen next.

With a bit of happy purring, Nepeta launched herself at Terezi, knocking her out of the fancy red chair. Terezi, giggling madly, didn't mind landing on her side with a cat troll on top of her; especially when the troll was licking her cheek like a mother cat would do to a kitten. After all the carpet she was laying on felt pretty gosh darn comfortable, and the olive green smell coming off of Nepeta was delicious.

"What are you doing in the lab?" Nepeta asked as she nuzzled Terezi's jaw line. "You know how easy it could have been for me to eat you?"

"Are you kidding? I heard you a yard away," Terezi responded. "And smelled you mile away too!" As if to demonstrate, she made a sniffing noise at Nepeta's green cheeks.

"Well, I wasn't trying to eat you in the furrst place," Nepeta laughed.

Terezi grinned happily at Nepeta. It was so nice to see Nepeta act almost like her old self: so cheerful, so fun. She scratched her behind her ear and heard some more purring being emitted from the cat troll's throat. Terezi often wondered if Nepeta actually did liked to be petted and touched like a normal meow beast, or if it was just for show. She didn't bother asking to not ruin moments like this.

"'So what is the mighty AC doing here in the lab herself?' GC asks. She glances down at you with her powerful eyes." Terezi asked, falling into her silly role-playing habits.

Nepeta quickly followed along. "AC just wants to let you that she'll be off explurring again before she leaves. She figures it was a good idea so you won't get worried."

Terezi's smiling lips twitched a bit as she struggled not to frown.

"Exploring? With a bend of her elegant long neck, GC becomes face to face with you. 'Where are you going?' She asks you."

Nepeta sheepishly looked away from Terezi and fiddled with her thumbs. "AC just wants to go hunting again. She's restless and she knows she's well enough to do it."

"GC nods her mighty head at you. Indeed you have gotten better and you're all healed now but…" Terezi trailed off. She arched her eyebrows and frowned, expressing her sad and worried expression. "But can't you just let it go… GC asks sadly."

Nepeta looked back at her and made a sad, helpless look. "AC can't. AC just can't. AC says she's sorry, but she'll never be able to sleep peacefurry if she can't find him."

Terezi sighed. She didn't even know why she was trying when Nepeta was as stubborn as a mule.

Kanaya wasn't the only one hunting for Gamzee. Within a day or two of the missing incident, Nepeta was able to convince Kanaya to hunt with her. Everyday they would go to their failed hunting, and while Kanaya would return with a scowl Nepeta would return with steaming fury.

Even when Kanaya had given up about a week ago, Nepeta kept on searching even when it seemed impossible. What Nepeta said about being restless was true. Yes, she was a bit bouncy and energetic back then, but now? She paced all over the place. It was as if sitting or laying down pained her, and that being in constant motions helped soothed her. Often times Terezi would see the troll's grey eyes dart from place to other, as if they were expecting to see someone pop out of the shadows any moment now. Terezi noticed how often Nepeta bugged the others into doing something active with her, such as a challenge in physical abilities. But most of the time she saw her challenging them into a play fight as if they were tools to sharpen her skills that were already through the roof… or as toys she'll have to settle with until she found the one she really wanted?

Indeed, Nepeta was restless. She's just this troll waiting for the right moment to happen. She's like a lion, who has the incredible patience to stalk their preys for who knew many hours until the final moment… only her prey can't be seen.

And Terezi knew how long Nepeta could wait.

Terezi took a deep breathe and smiled weakly. "GC worries about you, AC. You know that, right?"

Nepeta smiled. "Of course AC does. If anything, you could have been AC's meowrail if she hadn't met TC."


	8. Chapter 8

It was a day or two later, and Nepeta was sitting in her room.

She had a new room, of course. Her old room was like a second room inside her deceased moirail's room. Well, if anything, her old room was like her personal playroom where she can paint the walls as much as she wanted. Most of the time she used to sleep next to Equius in his own room, where his light breathing and the heat coming off of his grey sweat-scented skin helped her sleep ever since they came to the Veil.

With no Equius to sleep with, to spend her precious time with, means there's no point in spending time in his room or her own room. Why go back to his room when painful memories pulled at her heart strings; to make her feel so terribly alone when she realizes that there's no more Equius to comfort her?

So she had a new room, where it's much more roomier. If anything, it's closer to Terezi's own room. Just a few steps into the transportalizer and she'll suddenly find herself inside the blind troll's room that's full of endless stairways and colorful walls.

Nepeta's new room wasn't as nice as her old room, though. Where her old room had her ships painted on the walls, her new room didn't. She seemed to have lost her interest in shipping her friends when so many of them had died. Really, the only thing in her new bare room was a couple of cushions and pillows. She spent her time sleeping in the lab, if she did decided to sleep anyway.

Which wasn't that often.

Perched on top of a big puffy orange pillow, Nepeta had with her legs crossed. Placed on her lap was her drawing tablet computer, where she was logged into her Trollian. She stared at the screen, as if expecting something to pop up at any moment.

Often times Nepeta did this in her new room. She really had no idea what the whole point of doing this was. On one hand, nobody in the Veil really used Trollian as much as they used to. If they wanted to talk, they could have just dropped by each other's room. Use the speaker installed in the lab to call for someone if they wanted. On the other hand, pretty much everybody else that Nepeta enjoyed talking to is dead.

But Nepeta still couldn't understand why she was expecting something to happen!

It sounded a bit outrageous, really. She just had the smallest piece of hope that… that… someone might say something to her. That they might call her for help.

What if everybody else… wasn't dead? What any moment now, they could contact her and say how they're just fooling everybody around? What if they're in trouble and cried for help? Nepeta thought this notion was impossible. After all, they all discarded the dead bodies. They all knew that they're dead, and it's impossible for a bleeding dead body to suddenly wake up after a month.

Oh no, Nepeta was expecting something else. And this idea was just as impossible the last one.

Hissing to herself with frustration, she quickly started trolling someone who coincidentally was logged on.

arsenicCatnip [AC] began trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG]

AC: :33 hi karkat

CG: OH.

CG: HEY.

CG: YOU AGAIN.

AC: :33 yes me again

AC: :33 how are you today?

CG: GOOD.

AC: :33

CG:

AC: :33

CG: OKAY, IS THERE LIKE A REASON WHY YOU'RE TALKING TO ME ALL OF A SUDDEN?

CG: I KNOW THIS ISN'T THE FIRST GOD DAMN TIME YOU INTERUPPTED ME FROM MY REALLY IMPORTANT WORK, BUT I'M JUST SAYING.

CG: IF A GIRL SUDDENLY STARTS TALKING TO ME AND HAVE NOTHING TO SAY, WHAT DOES THAT FUCKING SAY ABOUT HER?

AC: :33 I dont know

CG: IT SAYS THAT SHE'S EITHER BORED AS A FUCKING CAT THAT CAN'T BRING ITSELF TO GO DO SOMETHING FUN IT'S *THAT* BORED,

CG: OR SHE'S JUST WANT TO SAY SOMETHING.

AC: :33 i guess its a bit of both.

CG: OKAY THEN.

CG: WHAT DO YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT?

CG: SHOULD I PRETEND TO WHEEL IN A CHAIR FOR YOU TO SIT ON, AND GET MYSELF A PENCIL AND NOTEPAD AND PRETEND THAT I'M A FUCKING PROFESSIONAL DOUCHE BAG THAT GETS PAID TO JUDGE YOU AND STATE THE FUCKING OBVIOUS ABOUT YOUR PROBLEMS?

AC: :33 that sounds nice actually nice right now

CG: OKAY.

CG: JUST LET ME SHARPEN MY PENCILS… OKAY, START.

AC: :33 so umm…

AC: :33 do you think im going crazy?

CG: DO YOU WANT ME TO HONESTLY ANSWER THAT?

AC: :33 i guess not

AC: :33 but im just wondering because of him

CG: OH GOG NOT THIS AGAIN.

CG: CAN'T YOU JUST FORGET ABOUT IT?

AC: :33 im sorry but I just cant!

AC: :33 and no one really seems to understand it! :((

CG: FINE SORRY.

CG: IT'S JUST THAT IT'S BEEN A MONTH ALREADY.

CG: OH WAIT SHIT I'M SUPPOSE TO SHUT UP. OKAY CONTINUE.

AC: :33 i just k33p thinking that maybe he might start talking to us again any moment now

AC: :33 wouldnt it be nice if he did?

AC: :33 we can finally see where hes hiding and i can finally get him

CG: RIGHT…

CG: BUT I SERIOUSLY DOUBT THAT WILL EVER HAPPEN.

CG: IT'S OKAY TO STILL ACT LIKE A LITTLE GRUB AND KEEP HOPING FOR SOME SHITTY MIRACLE HAPPEN, BUT IN THIS CASE IT'S NOT.

CG: I DON'T THINK HE'LL EVER COME BACK, NEPETA.

AC: :33 i know i know!

AC :33 i just cant

AC: :33 get him out of my mind

AC :33 you remember how i used to be red for you?

CG: YES.

AC: :33 well its not that but only with black felines for gamz33!

AC: :33 its so furrstrating!

AC: :33 its like hes the only thing i care about even if i want to hurt him so badly!

CG: OKAY, JUST TO MAKE SURE WE'RE ON THE SAME TRACK, YOU MEANT "FELINES" AS "FEELINGS" RIGHT?

AC: :33 yes

CG: OKAY.

CG: WOW, TALK ABOUT MAJOR QUADRANT ISSUES.

CG: IT'S A BIT IRONIC ACTUALLY.

CG: THE CAT WHO LOVES TO SHIP THINGS IN A SOMEHOW NON CREEPY WAY IS HERSELF STUCK IN A PERSONAL SHIPPING TROUBLE.

CG: I'D BE BULL SHITTING YOU IF I SAID I DON'T FEEL THE SAME WAY.

AC: :33 really?

CG: YES.

AC: :33 thats nice at least we have something in common

CG: RIGHT.

CG: YOU KNOW, EVEN YOU'RE NOT REALLY THAT INTERESTED IN ME ANYMORE, YOU'LL PROBABLY STILL HAVE ME IN ONE OF YOUR QUADRANTS ANYWAY.

AC: :33 really which one?

CG: I'LL PROBABLY BE AUSPISTICE FOR YOU AND GAMZEE.

CG: MAKE SURE YOU DON'T SKIN EACH OTHER ALIVE, ALL OF THAT SHIT.

CG: I JUST HOPE KANAYA DOESN'T BEAT ME FIRST.

AC: :33 wow gosh

AC: :33 im not sure how I f33l about that but thanks karkat

AC: :33 even if youre going to get in my way :PP

CG: YOU'RE FUCKING WELCOME I GUESS.

AC: :33 well i guess ill get off now

AC: :33 thanks again karkat

arsenicCatnip [AC] ceased trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG]

After exiting out of the chat log, Nepeta sighed as she closed her eyes and rubbed her head. It was true that she abandoned her unrequited red feelings for Karkat, and that seemed to make things less awkward with her and him. For Terezi, though, Nepeta doubted that she cared whether or not if this cat troll had feelings for her man.

The thought of Terezi made Nepeta remember part of the chat. Did Karkat mentioned how he felt the same way about his quadrant problems? She should really look into that…

Nepeta heard some beeping. It was the sound Trollian makes whenever someone was messaging you. She opened her eyes, curious to see who was trolling mer. Maybe it was Karkat again.

However, she was in for a surprise when she read who it was.

terminallyCapricious [TC] began trolling arsenicCatnip [AC]

TC: hey.

TC: SO IT SAYS THAT YOU'RE ON AND SHIT.

TC: and i thought i should say hi.

TC: YOU'RE NOT TALKING RIGHT NOW, WHICH IS COOL, BUT IF YOU CAN WILL YOU TRY ANSWER ME?

TC: because i think you have some business you still want to settle with me.

TC: ;o)

Nepeta gawked at her screen, not sure how to respond. So apparently, she was right. She was right to sit there in her room, hoping for a message from Gamzee.

So much ideas and plans went through her head. Should she tell someone? Should she tell Kanaya so they can start hunting again? They could lure Gamzee to the lab and ambush them. Should she tell Karkat to let him know that his moirail was safe and sound?

Nepeta chewed on her bottom lip for a while (damn it, why is he making her feel so nervous? It made her feel so pathetic) before deciding to answer him.


	9. Chapter 9

He was waiting patiently in a large room, rather far away from the lab if you decided to walk there instead of using the transportalizers. He didn't occupy this room that long, though. Normally, he would do all he can to get as far away from the others as possible. Whenever he gets bored, though, he would sneak around the Veil and spy on what the others were doing. Maybe stalk one of them around the hallways and feel this sudden great burst of fear mixed with excitement whenever he almost got caught.

But for today, he decided to risk his skin just to see her again. Just once, at least. Even if for a few minutes. He only wanted to see her again, and he definitely knew that she felt the same way.

Being alone is just so… lonely. Even if he wasn't right in the head anymore, he still wanted to have someone around to keep him from being so god damn bored all of the time. He craved for someone that can help him see more that beautiful bloody art he saw in those dead bodies… without the whole, being dead thing. This time he wanted his pieces of art to be alive for as long as possible, so he won't ever be without the screaming and crying and_ that beautiful liquid that will soon drip through his fingers. _

When the blood is all dried up, it will change into a different color, and he won't want that. Oh no sir, he wanted the blood to be the exact same color 24/7, and that meant having a constant supply of wet, fresh, dripping blood.

A constant supply of olive blood; of Nepeta Leijon.

He should forget that girl. There was more fish in the sea, and that meant more colors. He really should forget about her, but he just simply cannot.

He only killed two people, and one of them suddenly sprang back to life. He wasn't sure whether or not it was because Nepeta was still alive when he left her, but she's definitely alive and pissed off as hell too. No, he wanted her again because he wanted the chance to beat the shit out of her again.

He could still hear her screaming in his head, and it was just so fucking _delicious _that his breathing went a bit hard. He wanted the chance to break her again, and it imagined it to be better than last time because he knew she was ready for him. She was ready to fight him, to make him bleed and break almost as much as he did to her, and he found that to be something extremely pleasuring. He liked the idea of someone that will join in the fun with him and smack him around, rather than some wuss that will freeze up like a statue.

And he knew that Nepeta will join in.

So for now, he'll have to wait and hope that she will have the guts to show up. Sure, she said she will, but he couldn't help but doubt her a bit. He'll actually be disappointed if she didn't show up.

He just, really want, her. Even for a little bit. Anything to stop him from being so alone.

Being alone isn't fun.

His red husktop was perched on his lap. He was stilled logged into his trollian even though she logged out moments ago. His chat log with her was still open, and he couldn't help but read every comments over and over again as he waited for her.

Was she intentionally taking her time? To make him more agitated by the second?

terminallyCapricious [TC] began trolling arsenicCatnip [AC]

TC: hey.

TC: SO IT SAYS THAT YOU'RE ON AND SHIT.

TC: and i thought i should say hi.

TC: YOU'RE NOT TALKING RIGHT NOW, WHICH IS COOL, BUT IF YOU CAN WILL YOU TRY ANSWER ME?

TC: because i think you have some business you still want to settle with me.

TC: ;o)

AC: XOO argh!

AC: :33 what do you want?

AC: :33 if i ever s33 you again i will chop you up into kitty chow

AC: :33 where are you anyway

AC: :33 so i can hunt you down you fucking coward clown

TC: WOW, LANGUAGE.

TC: if i didn't know any better, i'd say you're excited to see me.

TC: ARE YOU EXCITED TO SEE ME, NEPETA?

AC: :33 bluh

AC: :33 of course not!

AC: :33 didnt s33 you for a month, didnt care at all

AC: :33 no seriously, what do you want?

AC: :33 why are you talking to me all of a sudden? :((

TC: like i said before, i think you still want some business to settle with.

AC: :33 business?

TC: YEAH.

TC: like maybe smacking me around a bit, claw my eyes out, things like that.

TC: SO I WAS WONDERING IF YOU WANTED TO DO THAT TODAY.

TC: as in now.

AC: :33 right now?

TC: RIGHT NOW.

AC: :33 why?

TC: well, it gets boring around here with no one to talk to besides karkat.

TC: AND I FEEL SO BAD ABOUT OUR LITTLE INCIDENT.

TC: i just want to be "furrends" again and let you get even with me.

TC: :o)

AC: :33 …

AC: :33 whats the catch?

TC: WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

AC: :33 are you planning on doing something bad to me?

AC: :33 maybe finish me off for good like a traitor you are?

TC: no, of course not.

TC: WHY WOULD YOU ASK ME THAT?

AC: :33 you just

AC: :33 killed equius

AC: :33 and tried to kill me too

AC: :33 and you expect me to trust you that easily again?

AC: :33 lame :/

TC: please, nepeta.

TC: I'M OFFERING YOU A CHANCE TO FUCK ME UP AS MUCH AS YOU WANT SO I CAN HAVE YOUR FORGIVENESS.

TC: what more do you want?

AC: :33 we all know what i want you fucker DDX

AC: :33 but fine

AC: :33 youre sick and disgusting but i accept

AC: :33 tell me where youre at so i can rip you some new scars

TC: GREAT.

TC: don't tell anyone where i am though.

TC: WE DON'T WANT ANYBODY TO RUIN OUR LITTLE FUN, RIGHT?

AC: :33 no purromises

TC: oh c'mon don't be like that

Within the next few minutes, he gave Nepeta the directions to where they were to meet. Which was right in this room where he's at, waiting for her. Sure, he had to lie a bit to convince her to come see him, but he was confident that she will listen to him and come alone.

After all, she wanted to join in the fun with no interruptions, right? He knew he did.

He didn't want the screaming to stop.


	10. Chapter 10

Everybody had that little voice inside their head; that voice that made you second guess things. That voice that made you wonder if you should do this, do that, or shouldn't do anything at all. If you ever hear that voice, then you would know for sure that what you're about to do might not be a good idea.

Some voices whispered to you, as if you're trying to decide what to wear and it tells you to skip that hideous overcoat. Some voices shouted to you, trying to avert your attention from something bad - like a fire, or an animal with rabies. Some voices you just can't hear at all, though it was probably because you're screwed up in the head.

Which Nepeta wasn't. Her head was working just fine, so she could definitely hear that voice screaming like an injured animal that needed to be put out of it's misery.

She knew exactly what it was saying. It saying these exact words: _DON'T DO IT. TURN AROUND THIS INSTANT YOUNG LADY._

She heard it as she walked through the hall ways.

_I'M WARNING YOU. THIS IS A BIG MISTAKE._

She heard it as she stepped onto the transportalizers.

_YOU CAN'T DO THIS ALONE. YOU NEED HELP!_

Hell, she still heard it even if she tried distracting her mind to something.

_YOU'RE GOING TO GET FUCKING KILLED!_

What a load of bananas. Nepeta knew exactly what kind of dangers she's about to step into.

One: she's about to meet up with a murderous clown that almost killed her (it doesn't even matter if he's inviting _her_ to take a whack at _him_). And two: no one will know what might happen to her. She's probably not going to admit it to Gamzee, but she really doesn't want them to be disturbed. This was her moment to shine and nobody was going to take it away.

Which meant that she didn't tell anybody where she went. If anything, it'll be as if she's off to do some pointless hunting again. A pointless hunting that might take a two or day to make the others finally realize that she's not coming back.

_It's all so stupid_, this nagging voice kept telling her. _STUPID._

_Shut the fuck up already! _She thought irritably.

The next thing she knew, she was almost there. Just one more transportalizer, and she'll be there to meet with destiny.

The voices were so intense at this very moment. So many voices were shouting at her at once and it was practically impossible to be able to tell what they were saying. Some were telling her to get the hell away from there.

With all of these voices buzzing in her head, she actually stopped moving. She was actually standing still, and considering what she was about to do.

This was all crazy. She needs to stop. She needs to…

Stop listening.

With a flick of her tail, she hastily stepped onto the transportalizer. With a flash of light, she was standing in a room.

Sitting comfortably right ahead of her was Gamzee Makara. He was looking down at his red husktop, and she could see his eyes darting from side from side. Was he reading? What the hell was he reading at a time like this? The way he was chewing on his bottom lip, and the way his eyes darted nervously, made her wonder if it was something nerve wracking.

She could see him slowly smile, and could see him slowly tilt his head up. His eyes were peeking at her, and the way he was still biting his bottom lip while smiling with dark humor gave him a… rather odd expression, really. Nepeta didn't know why, but the way he was staring at her as if he just noticed her for the first time… it made her heart beat. It made her feel flushed and excited, like she wanted to see him.

She hated this feeling.

Nepeta stepped off of the transportalizer and took a few baby steps towards him. She noticed about eerily quiet it had became, and then she realized that the voices stopped talking all at once. It was as if they decided that there was no point in continuing pestering her when she transportalized; she just sealed her fate with one step, and there was nothing they could do about it after this point.

Now it was just her and him, glaring at each other like natural enemies.

Eventually, he reached for the top of his husktop and began closing it, taking his sweet ass time as if he didn't have a care in the world. Watching him close it inch by inch made her skin crawl with impatience, and soon she found herself hastily walking over towards him.

She reached out and slammed the husktop before sticking her face in his own. She curled her lips over her teeth, showing off their sharpness even though she was well aware that his own were sharper.

Feeling his warm breath on her lips, she couldn't help but feel a bit jittery. However, she willed herself to be calm. She asked him in a low voice, "How do we start?" and was surprised by how brave she sounded.

Gamzee made a small laugh and softly pushed her away from him. "Alright motherfucker. JUST GIVE ME SOME ROOM."

He picked up his husktop off of his lap and placed it on the ground next to him before standing up. She took some steps away from him and watched him move. He was stretching his arms over his heads, and she could hear his joints popping. How long was he just sitting there, reading?

Now they were both standing up, and watching each other carefully. Nepeta took a moment to size him up. She obviously knew she was the shortest of all the trolls. She knew that Gamzee was obviously the tallest. He was big in comparison to her. Even if she had all of the big, firm muscles, and he was all skin and bones, she knew how slim her chances were of beating him. He was, after all, the highblood. Powerful and scary. If he wasn't so unexpectedly powerful, then he could probably beat her in a foot race with his long legs. If she changed her mind and decided to run for it, he could probably chase her down and overpower her if he wanted.

She was screwed, all in all.

"So what are you waiting for, sis?" He asked quietly. He was still making that stupid smile.

"Just wanted to see if you wanted to change your mind," She replied.

Gamzee shook his head and took a step towards her. "ARE YOU MOTHERFUCKING SURE YOU'RE JUST NOT SCARED OF ME RIGHT NOW?"

Nepeta in turn took a step towards him. "No, of course not."

Then they were just taking turns taking steps towards each other. They were coming closer to each other by the second up the point where there were no more steps left to take. He was standing dangerously close to her, and he was looking down at her as she looked up at him. She never noticed this before, she only stood up to his chest. It made her feel more discouraged of winning.

Nepeta realized that she had no idea what she wanted to do next. Sure, she wanted revenge - she wanted it badly - but she couldn't just start attacking all of the sudden… could she? She wasn't sure. She wasn't used to fighting for her life with another troll. Especially one that made her feel so _bad._

It was an awkward silence, and she wanted to say something - anything - to make it go away.

So she blurted out the first thing that came to mind. "How was hiding for a month?" She paused, realizing what she just asked, and quickly added, "If you weren't such a coward, you wouldn't have to hide, you know…"

He made a little shrug. "It's kind of hard to not be brave when every motherfucker wants you dead…"

"So why invite me to whack you?"

"WELL, ONE DAY, I THOUGHT TO MYSELF: WHY THE FUCK NOT?"

"That's not very convincing… You're going to do something, and it won't be good."

He gave another shrug. "You're not really that stupid, though."

"So you _are_ planning on doing something?" She asked, a hint of panic in her voice despite the fact that she was expecting something bad to happen. She tried to take a step away from her, but she hadn't anticipated him suddenly wrapping an arm around her, his hand tightly clasping her shoulder. "What the fuck!"

"RELAX, SIS." With a free hand, he was lightly touching her hair. He was running her messy hair through his fingers, sometimes pulling at the strands softly. She started to feel weak at the knees, and her heart was racing fast. She couldn't help but wrap her arms around his torso, fingers clinging to his shirt as if she was afraid she was going to fall down. She was looking away from him, ashamed of feelings so flustered instead of mad with blood lust. She did came here with some intentions of shedding his blood after all, and what does he do instead? Make her weak like a kitten.

"I am going to motherfucking do something, but I can't really do it if you don't trust me, y'know?" His voice sounded husky, and it was like a buzz in her ears. "IT'S NOT LIKE IT'S A BAD THING, REALLY. But then again, it's probably something we motherfucking can't do in public."

"What are you…" She started, but couldn't finish. He was rubbing the back of her head, and it was oddly pleasurable. She was afraid that he was going to do something terrible, like maybe he was trying to distract her so he could easily jerk her head in an angle and break her neck. There _has_ to be a reason why he was being so… weird!

"I'M JUST GOING TO DO SOMETHING I ALWAYS WANTED TO DO," He replied, sounding so calm. She didn't bother asking what he was talking about; she didn't want to risk sounding so weak.

Instead, she felt him curling her hair between his fingers. He was gripping the roots of her hair tightly in his hand, and he pulled down a bit, making her tilt her head up. He was leaning over, bring his head so close towards her own that she felt his breathe again. She was quivering a bit, afraid of what was going to happen next.

And what happened next, was a kiss.

He lightly pressed his lips to her own. They felt so chapped and dry, but she couldn't bring herself to pull away from him… mostly because of the fact that he was still gripping. Her eyes fluttered close, her fingers gripping on his shirt so tightly that she may had poked holes in the dirty fabric with her sharp nails. Their lips were overlapped with her bottom lip captured between his lips. She felt him open his mouth a bit, where he carefully bit her bottom lip. He was pulling on it lightly, trying not to shed some of her blood with his sharp teeth. She couldn't help but let out a soft whimper.

She opened her eyes a bit, peeking at his face. He was making a small smile, eyes half-lidded and staring back at her.

Everything felt so great.

It felt so great…


	11. Chapter 11

Nepeta jolted a bit and jerked out of his arms. Her legs felt shaky, and she was breathing hard as she took some steps away from him.

"Get the fuck away from me!" She hissed at him. "I'm having none of your shit today!"

He looked at her with a blank expression; his arms were still held in the air where they were holding her moments before. "What? DID I DO SOMETHING WRONG, SIS?"

"You're trying to lure me in! Trying to make me weak so you can take me down easily!"

"That's a lot of bull shit, sis."

"Well that can't be the maid reason why you asked me to come here! To do sloppy make outs!" She pointed an accusing finger at him. "I came here to finish what we started! But what happens when I come and see you? You start making a move on me and kissing me and shit! You're trying to distract me so you can do something bad!"

She was breathing hard. She was shaking, and she felt so mad for falling into this mess.

Gamzee tilted his head at her and dropped his arms to his sides. He was smiling again. "YEAH, I GUESS I WAS TRYING TO DISTRACT YOU. You see what I mean, sis? YOU'RE NOT THAT MOTHERFUCKING STUPID. I was just trying to soften up the meat, because it was so motherfucking tender." He sighed and shook his head. "TENDER MEAT ISN'T THAT MOTHERFUCKING TASTY."

Nepeta glared at him. She unsheathed her blue, steel claws and held them protectively in front of her. "Quit messing around, and lets start."

He said nothing. He was only smiling at her, like she was a lost kitten that no one will miss…

Suddenly, he was moving quickly towards her like a blur. She didn't know how he was this fast, but she didn't have time to think; by the time she realized what just happen, he landed a punch to her stomach.

She yowled with pain and slashed at him with a claw. He managed to grab her wrist before her claw came in contact with his face, and she in turn grabbed his arm. He was far more lighter than what Nepeta had expected, so it was pleasantly easy for her to flip him into the air. He landed on his big feet, and yanked at her wrist, making her fall over.

She arched her back a bit, and with a bit of sliding, she kicked at his legs. He fell over, almost on top of her, and he had to let go of her wrist to catch himself on his side. As quickly as she could, she got on all fours pounced onto of him while using a claw to slash at his torso. She made a clean cut, and he now had four cuts going from his back to his side on his shirt. It was a deep enough cut to make his precious purple blood spill out.

He growled and twisted his body a bit. He grabbed a fist full of her shirt, yanked hard, and pulled her off of him to the side before she could react. She was on her side, and he let go of her shirt to push her to onto her belly. He got on top of her, sitting on her lower back and tightly straddling her sides with his legs. She was kicking her feet furiously while he leaned over and pinned both of her wrists to the ground with one hand. He easily pulled her claws specibi out of her hands one by one with his other hand, and he equipped them into his jokerkind. She now had no weapon to defend herself with, and she was being topped by Gamzee who was still pinning her wrists down.

"Get off!" She shouted, stilling trying to twist and wiggling him off.

"But this is part of the fun. MAYBE I'LL GET TO RIDE THE MIGHTY, TOUGH LION," He chuckled.

"NO YOU WILL NOT!"

"You're kind of out of options right now, sis."

She shouted and shouted, flinging all kinds of obscene words at him, but she knew it wasn't going to help her at all. She was stuck under the rump of a crazed clown, and even though he was pretty light, he had the strength of a madman and was able to hold her down so easily. It was asinine and she felt so humiliated that this could be her last moment.

"Get… off…" She demanded, but more quietly this time. She felt tired from wasting all of her energy thrashing, and now she was barely moving.

"ARE YOU TIRED? Already?" Gamzee actually sounded a bit disappointed and it made her feel ashamed of herself.

"I'm getting tired of… of… your bullshit!" Nepeta closed her eyes and pressed her warm cheek to the ground, finding the coldness relieving even though it was kind of dirty. "Can't you come up with something more creative?"

"WHAT'S NOT MOTHERFUCKING CREATIVE ABOUT THIS?"

"Well, it's not fair! You're bigger than me! You're pretty much sitting on a wiggler sized troll here!" She complained. "Besides, you're going against your words again!"

He made a groan. "At least let me mess around a bit before it's your motherfucking turn."

"No!"

"YES."

"No, no, no, no!" She was kicking her feet again. "You did enough already! Now it's my turn. _My turn!"_

"Alright, alright, calm your motherfucking rumble spheres. YOU'RE LIKE A LITTLE BRAT RIGHT NOW, AND IT'S SO CUTE THAT IT MAKES ME MOTHERFUCKING SICK."

"I… what?"

Without replying, Gamzee let go of her wrists and got off of her. Nepeta was just laying there, confused about what he just said, before eventually shuffling up onto her feet and brushing some dirt off of her clothes with her back facing him. Without moving her body, she turned her head to the side to glance at him.

"It would be nice if you gave me back my claws, you know…" She said quietly.

"Why don't we do it motherfucking primal? JUST USE OUR HANDS AND SHIT," He suggested. "I mean, it's not like you have a choice or anything, since I got your motherfucking strife specibi."

She frowned and took a look at her nails. They were considerably longer and sharper than any of the other trolls or humans, but they were still short none the less. Could she really do that much damage against him if she just used her own little claws? It's been a while since she hunted animals that way, so it was hard to tell.

"Agh, fine, have it your way," She said distastefully. Nepeta turned around faced him, this time with her own bare hands held in front of her. She was bending a little bit, crouched and ready to attack the highblood. "I better get them back when I'm done with you!"

"WHATEVER, SIS." He lifted his arms into the air, as if he was offering her a hug.

They stood like that for a while; a crouching tiger and a friendly clown. Eventually, she decided she had enough, and just sprang into the air. What was odd was that he didn't even move an inch when he saw her do this. He just stood there, with a smug smile upon his messy face, even when she just slammed into him.

She knocked him down to the ground, where he landed on this back without even a grunt even when she was straddling him. Without hesitation, she hastily started attacking at him. Fingers curled like claws, she was slashing at his chest. She ripped through the fabrics of his dirty shirt, exposing his delicate torso. She slashed through his skin, leaving behind cuts and lacerations. This precious purple blood was spilling out of his wounds, and it was soaking his shirt and her pants.

It was so odd, really. He was looking up at the ceiling, without even a grimace or a pained face. Just a small smile. It was at if she was only playfully pawing his chest. This enraged her, so she changed tactics and started punching him in the head. She was yelling, screaming again, as she continued punching him.

She felt so mad. So terribly mad.

Here, right under her, was this _monster._ This thing that killed her moirail. This thing that was fucking around with her, making her feel so bad and shameful.

She's been given a chance to dish out all kinds of things to him. She could cut him all over and make him bleed. She could slit his throat and watch him gurgle with blood in his mouth until he dies. She could do all kinds of things to him, and he knew it.

And yet here he was, not giving any sign of pain or fear, all while rubbing her knees with his hands.

Was he taking her seriously? Probably not, and it made her _furious._

But perhaps the thing that made her most mad was the fact that she didn't kill him yet.

Eventually, Nepeta ran out of steam, and slowly stopped moving at all. She just sat there, huffing and puffing, and he was just laying there like a lifeless doll. She studied his face as she was catching his face. It was still looking up at the ceiling, and it was still smiling even though he had multiple bruises on his face. Some parts were swelling, some had cut skin and was bleeding, and yet he was still smiling as if he just took a walk through the park. For fuck's sake, she even knocked some of his teeth out and he was still smiling.

It was even worse when he suddenly looked at her and asked, "Are you done yet?"

She stared at him, not saying a word, before she placed her hands on his bloody chest. She slowly slid them up towards his neck, where she gingerly touched his throat. She could feel his heart pulse with her finger tips. "No, not yet…" She said softly, a blank expression upon her face as she gently massaged around his throat and collarbones.

"DO YOU HAVE SOMETHING UP YOUR MOTHERFUCKING SLEEVES?"

"Maybe…"

Gamzee slowly moved and sat up, where Nepeta slid down on him and ended up in his lap. He wrapped his arms around her and rested his chin on her shoulder.

"Wanna take a break, sis? YOU LOOK DEADBEAT."

She wrapped her arm around his torso again, and she couldn't help but nuzzle his head. She was tired, and he was so warm… but that was probably because he was covered with fresh blood. Her eyes closed wearily and she made a soft sigh. "Purrhaps…"

"OH LOOK. You're making those cat puns again," He laughed as he petted the top of her head. "I GUESS YOU'RE CALMING DOWN A BIT."

"I'm just waiting," She replied.

"Waiting for what? FOR ME TO SLOWLY BLEED TO DEATH? Now _that_ isn't motherfucking creative, sis."

"Shut the fuck up, Gamzee."

"WHATEVER."

Nepeta opened her eyes and moved away from him a bit, taking in his current appearance. His hair was a total mess; more tangled and knotted than what it would have been months ago. His face was still covered with makeup, but barely. Most of it was probably rubbed off so it revealed more of his natural looking face. He actually looked more tired than what she expected him to be. The cuts on his face were finally reduced to long, pale purple lines. He probably wouldn't be able to cover them up with makeup, no matter how much he might layer on his face. His eyes still had that tint of red in them, and they were still watching her every move.

His face was blank at first, but when he caught her eyes making contact with him, his dry lips cracked a smile. "Like what you see, sis?"

She pulled a disgusted face. "You look god _pawful."_

He shrugged before shifting his arms down to her lower part of her body. His elbows were resting on legs as his hands were placed on her lower back. Her eyes moved down to his torso, where it was now easily exposed since his shirt was all shredded. He was rather skinny and lean; lean enough that a couple of rips were showing, but he had enough meat to keep him alive. She moved her hands to his chest, where she lightly touched the cuts she had inflicted minutes before. They were still bleeding; not to mention the rather deep cuts she made with her claws specibi that were on his sides.

"You should really patch that up, you know…" She said.

"I WOULD."

"But…?"

"Are you done playing?" He tilted his head a bit, his smile now wide and smug.

His expression quickly irritated her. "For now!" She said hastily. "It would be a bit of a disappointment if it ended all to suddenly." She pulled herself out of his arms and scrambled up to her feet. She walked away from him, pretending to be interested in smoothing out the wrinkles in her clothes.

Oh fuck, her clothes. Her entire front side of her clothes were covered with purple blood. How was she going to explain this to the others when she comes back? She could practically hear them ask her skeptical questions: _Did you really spill grape juice on yourself, Nepeta? Did you _really_?_

She turned around at glare at him, who was still sitting down on the ground. "Look at what you did!" She yelled.

He held his hands as if to motion her to stop. With an arched eyebrow and slightly pursued lips, he had on a comical face. "WHAT? It looks motherfucking great on you. IT BRINGS OUT YOUR BAD SIDE," He said as he got up to his feet.

Nepeta growled and walked up to him. She tried to look tough by placing her hands on her hips and sticking her face into his. However, she was too short to make it look serious. Gamzee looked like he trying to hold make a smile as he crossed his arms. He even leaned down a bit to help her with the weird face thing. Obviously, it made her more mad.

_I have to think of something to outsmart him… Shock him, maybe. _She thought to herself. _I won't let him have the last laugh._

But what?

After a moment of posing like this, Gamzee began to straighten up as if he was tired of his silliness. Without even thinking, Nepeta hastily reached out and grabbed his head. She jerked it towards her face, where she landed a kiss on his lips.

_That will show him. _

Needless to say, he wasn't surprised at all as he placed his hands on her waist, but hey; let the cat have her fun. Especially when she's trying to act tough and was practically trying to chew his lips off.


	12. Chapter 12

She took a bath to try and erase evidence. Right after she was done with Gamzee, she sneaked to her room to gather some fresh clothes. After that, she hurried over to the bathroom and made sure to lock the door.

Although she was pretty warm, she felt so cold and tired, and all she wanted to do was bathe in some hot water. So she just sat there, naked in the big tub, hugging her legs to her chest and resting her chin on her knees. Purple blood soaked through her clothes and onto her skin, and now it was slightly tinting the water of it's hues as the time went by.

After what seemed like ages, she grabbed a bar of soap and a sponge and started scrubbing her body down.

She tried to scrub off the blood off of her skin. She tried to scrub off the feel of his touch. She just scrubbed until her grey skin started turning green and painfully sensitive, and the water was beginning to turn cold.

Finally, she crawled out of the tub and let the water go down the drain. Paranoia grabbed her and she started scrubbing down the tub too, for fear that Kanaya might find traces of Gamzee's blood in it. It sounded ridiculous, but when you have a rainbow drinker with a chainsaw walking around you can't really take any chances.

Once satisfied, she changed into her new clothes. She picked up her green trench coat to inspect it, then grimaced when she saw how stained it was with purple blood. She thought about filling the bathtub up with water again to try and wash her dirty clothes, but she knew how difficult it was wash blood stains off of clothes. If there was a special way of removing those, then she obviously didn't know it, and she wasn't about to ask the others for help for the risk of creating suspicion.

So she just bundled up her clothes and used her coat to wrap it all up. Being careful not to touch any of the bloody parts, she picked up her bundle of clothes and quickly ran off to her room. Once inside, she struggled to figure out where to hide her dirty clothes (she'll figure out a way to get rid of them later) and finally decided to stash them under her pile of animal furs she collected from her many hunting trips in the past.

A black shirt and a gray pants were easy to replace, but her trench coat? She'll have to find the room with the alchemizer later, but not now. Oh no, she needed to find Terezi. She's been away far too long.

Taking a small gulp of breathe, Nepeta exited her room, ventured through the hallways, then finally made it to Terezi's room.

"AC crouches onto her paws, her bottom wiggling in the air before she purresses furrward," Nepeta said quietly as she peeked her head through the doorway. Just like what her cat character was doing, she was crouched on the floor and moving on all fours. "She spots you across your room."

Terezi's back was facing her way. Sitting next to her on the ground was Dave and WV.

Nepeta wasn't around when this carapace arrived -she was sleeping. But she has been told that he was mysteriously transported to their location, but with a big gaping hole in his stomach. She hardly believed them, but someone a dead Feferi and Eridan, who had ascended God Tier, appeared. With her god powers, Feferi healed WV. After that, the two trolls somehow vanished.

Now the three were buddies. They did all kinds of goofy, buddies stuff together, and most of the time it was drawing with chalk. It appeared that today they were all hanging in Terezi's room.

"Oh…" Nepeta said softly, her eyes wide open. She barely got around to knowing Dave and WV, and here she was all crouched with her ass waving in the air. She quickly lowered her butt and tried crawling backwards away from the room.

"GC turn her mighty heads towards- Whoa, whoa, where are you going Nepeta?" Terezi's head was facing her now, and her voice stopped Nepeta in her tracks.

Nepeta felt awkward trapped like a kitten stuck under a box. All six eyes were on her. "I was just… I didn't know you had company. Sorry for intepurrupting," She hastily apologized. Her cheeks were quickly flushing green.

"Don't be sorry!" Terezi made a bright, toothy smile. "Why don't you come closer? I'm sure the sneaky little AC wouldn't like having her cute little ambushes aborted."

"No, she wouldn't…" Nepeta mumbled under her breathe.

Even after some coaxing attempts, Nepeta still wouldn't come closer to the three. She just quickly said her goodbyes, closed the door, turned around, and walked off towards her room.

She couldn't help but think about Terezi and Dave's relationship. Nepeta was sure that Terezi and Karkat had a red romance going on. She had watched Terezi crawl closer and closer into Dave's arms. Was she tired of Karkat's embrace?

Oh, fuck it all. She needed a long nap before she could think about complicated shit like this.

But when she got back into her room, she heard that little beeping sound emitting from her drawing tablet computer...


	13. Chapter 13

He hadn't done it yet. Why didn't he do it yet? He had all the time to do; all the time they spent together, either shedding some blood (mostly his) or getting really comfy.

Maybe he was distracted by the satisfaction he felt when she inflicted pain on him. It made him have feelings again, and it made him love every minute of it.

Maybe it was them settling down after getting tired and just _talking._ Even if most of them were kind of boring and awkward, it was pleasant to hear her voice through his ears, especially when they start mumbling with sleep.

Or maybe it was just them having some spicy make outs, and admittedly that shit made him go dumb in the head just for a little bit.

He didn't know what the reason was, but he was starting to get frustrated with pressured needs and wants.

It's been what, a week or two? Throughout all of that time, he still hadn't heard even one scream escaping her lips. Yes, there was the fact that he actually did hear her scream before, but those screams? Those screams are fury; a bottled up anger, and he's helping her pop the cap off to let the pressure out.

He did liked hearing that kind of screaming -it was so delightful to see the cute, friendly kitty turn into a furious lion, all because of him- but he longed for a different one now. He wanted a scream that begged for mercy, a scream full of frighten sobbing.

Gamzee Makara wanted to turn the table and hurt Nepeta Leijon. He wanted to knock her to the ground, kick her around a bit, and maybe yank on her hair so hard from the behind that her precious neck is exposed for the ruining. He wanted to do all kinds of unspeakable things to her, and they all ended up with his hands all slick and slippery with warm olive blood as a pulse of ecstasy washes through his veins…

He wanted it so bad, and as the time went by the wants became more urging.

Which brings us to our question: _Why didn't he do it yet?_

He had plenty of opportunities to do it; to hurt her. Whenever he hit her up on Trollian, he had the chance to plant make her suspicious of her peers. Whenever she agreed to come meet him, he had the chance to lure her to a trap. Whenever she hit him, he had the chance to hit her back. Whenever she was tired and curled up against him, he had the chance to hurt her in her sleepy form. Fuck, he _still _had her claws, and that gave him the chance to hurt her defenseless body (if he got past her hands, of course).

And yet he doesn't. At first he told himself that he wanted to wait until she trusted him. Then when he takes one look at her sweet, little face, and he suddenly feels that god awful feeling he gets days ago when he nearly killed her. He realized that it was guilt, and it was stopping him from what he wants.

Gamzee strongly disliked guilt. Guilt made him feel like he's doing something wrong. Guilt made him feel weak and it stopped him from his wicked plans.

He didn't feel guilty when he beheaded Tavros with his own teeth.

He didn't feel guilty when he killed Equius.

And yet he felt guilty whenever he thought about beating Nepeta up, even if it was just for a little bit.

It guilt that made him bitterly hate Nepeta. It was guilt that made him feel ashamed of this hate and made him want to love her instead.

All of this thinking made his head feel like a jackhammer working it's way through his think pan, and he rubbed his temple as a soft growl escaped his lips.

He was in a room he currently occupied. Karkat was in this room with him, doing a daily checkup on his moirail, and he was cursing to himself when he took a glance at Gamzee's fresh claw marks. The old ones were just little lines of scars now.

"How the fresh pile of stinking shit working it's way down town do you keep getting these?" He cursed while taking great care of adding band aids to Gamzee's wounds.

"I sure ain't got the slightest clue my pale brother," Gamzee replies with a shrug.

"How the ever loving fuck do you end up cuts and don't have the slightest clue of what just happened to your bony ass body?" Karkat asked him. "What? Were you signing a form that lets you legally state, 'I am the most ridiculous little shit to bless this Earth' and then you managed to give yourself giant paper cuts? Were you out in the yard, raking away those nasty little turds human birds keep leaving on your land like little presents of innocent joy, and you just decided to rake yourself some battle scars to show them who's boss? Were you, Gamzee? _Were you?_"

"OH COURSE NOT, WHY THE FUCK WOULD I DO THAT? I mean, I don't even have a rake so it's not like I can get my raking on, you hear me?" He replied. "HEY, BEST BRO, YOU'RE GETTING YOUR MOTHERFUCKING SHOUTING ON AGAIN. You could chill down before you gone and pop some vein."

"Gamzee, right now you should be shutting your trap so tightly that you might forget how to put food in there." Karkat was busy trying to peel open the last band aid. "I appreciate your pale actions, but you are seriously injured right now and I don't need a bunch of bumbling, disrupting words knocking my pale socks off of my feet."

"RELAX THE MOTHERFUCKING UP, KARKAT. I'm not that scuffed up and all. YOU'RE JUST BEING WAAAY TOO WORRIED."

"Do we need to talk about the _first_ time you came crawling back to me on all fours like a little barkbeast, begging with your eyes for my wonderful and expert help?"

"Well, from what I remember, I gone and give you a call and you came all the way running over here."

"And from what _I _remember, you were nearly bleeding to death as if he you just got into a fight with a nasty hag." Karkat poked at Gamzee's side, where the biggest of his scars was located. Four long ones. "And you _still _don't want to talk about these? These cuts that nearly made you fucking bleed to _death?_"

Gamzee replied with a shake of his head and a smile.

"Are you shitting me? Are you seriously going to keep some secrets from your own _moirail?"_ Karkat demanded, sounding a bit hurt.

"I'M SORRY MY PALE BROTHER, BUT THERE ARE SOME THINGS A CLOWN LIKE ME CAN'T EXPLAIN UNTIL THE END."

"Whatever," Karkat grumbled. "At least your new cuts are a lot smaller and harmless. It's like a fucking bug tried to pick a knife fight with you. It's amazing."

And it was true (at least the cuts part). Gamzee had noticed that Nepeta went a lot softer with him lately, even to the point that she was halfheartedly punching him. They spent more time together just… talking. Maybe kissing and all, but much to his disappointment she just kind of stopped being violent. It was as if the anger was slowly leaving her body. Their meetings were starting to get… well not boring. It wasn't heart racing fun anymore, but it wasn't boring.

It wasn't until Karkat left that he decided it was about time he finally let himself get what he really wanted -before _all _of the excitement was gone. He didn't know what will happen afterwards -like if Nepeta will ever want to see him again- but he forced himself to not care. To care will lead him being guilty, and he had enough of that shit. He wanted to be strong with power, and he was certain that after this event he'll finally stop feeling the guilt.

But still, he wanted to wait for the perfect timing. He had to admit, he had enough time to make Nepeta trust him. She may not had said it herself, but her halfhearted punches said everything. Even then, he told himself to be patient. He can't just be hasty and rush into this, right? Good things happens to the patience, after all.

However, it didn't take him long to wait, because right when he opened his husktop a message popped up on his screen.

AC: :33 i cant believe im saying this

AC: :33 but i despurrately n33d your help


End file.
